The time may come when you notice that your aging loved ones (or even you) are showing signs of memory issues. Thoughts of Alzheimer’s and dementia start to crowd your world, along with the possibility of a move to a memory care community. South Mountain Memory Care is a community located in the Lehigh Valley, PA, near Allentown. We know moving from home to a memory care community is a unique journey that looks different for everyone. It’s often overwhelming, an overload of information, riddled with guilty thoughts and uncomfortable conversations.
What can you expect as you begin the journey to a memory care community?
Because the senior living journey looks different for every person and every family moving into a memory care community, there is no one-size-fits-all approach, but there are some general guidelines that can help.
Plan ahead
It is wise for families to think and talk about the possibility early and often, so when the time comes that additional care is needed, a plan is in place, and the move happens when care needs and cognitive concerns may be minimal.
If a loved one is already living in an independent or assisted living part of a community and cognitive concerns arise, this might mean moving from the traditional side of the community to a secure memory care neighborhood or other memory care community.
In this case, because the resident has already left their own house and home and has already experienced life in an assisted living community, the move to memory care may not be as disconcerting. The move will still be an adjustment for everyone, but the familiarity of care services and dedicated associates will ease the transition.
What should I expect when considering a memory care community?
Some families don’t begin their senior living journey until they notice signs that something is out of the ordinary with themselves or their loved ones. Maybe Mom is forgetting to turn the oven off, or Dad wandered off while on his walk and couldn’t remember how to get home. At this point, the family is no longer looking for traditional assisted living—they are looking for a community specializing in memory care.
If your first time stepping foot into a senior living community is to visit a memory care neighborhood, it might be a little bit surprising.
It is important to remember that memory care neighborhoods are designed for the residents living there—not the prospective families on a tour! So, there will be features that are unfamiliar or uncomfortable to you but are necessary for your loved one to thrive.
Here are a few examples of the importance of design in a memory care community
Wayfinding and orientation You may see objects or artwork to assist residents with seasonal or temporal orientation. This means incorporating landmarks at decision-making points to remind residents what activities or events happen in that space or what direction they need to head in to return to their apartment. For example, artwork that incorporates silverware in the dining room may help cue the resident that this is where they come to eat.
A safe and secure environment The idea that your loved one will be living in a space that can only be entered using a code or by buzzing in may be a difficult adjustment. This allows residents to walk and wander freely and safely within the neighborhood and courtyard without the risk of getting lost or hurt.
How should I view life in a memory care community?
Remember that everyone’s journey with dementia and Alzheimer’s is different. There is a quote by Thomas Kitwood that says, “If you’ve met one person with dementia, you’ve met one person with dementia—we’re all different.” This means your loved one’s journey with dementia will look different and may be at a different stage from their neighbor or anyone else in the memory care neighborhood you visit.
When visiting a memory care community, you may see things that seem out of the ordinary or unfamiliar to you but are adaptive to the resident’s needs. Maybe a resident is helping an associate set the tables in the dining room. In this case, the resident worked in restaurants his whole life and finds joy and purpose in setting the tables. You might see a resident holding a baby doll, because she worked as a labor and delivery nurse for many years and finds comfort in comforting someone else.
For South Mountain Memory Care, part of providing the best care is finding ways to bring purpose, comfort, and home into the everyday lives of our residents. Sometimes this looks like singing with them as we walk down the hallway, and other times it’s allowing someone to oversee watering all the flowers and plants in our courtyard because they grew up owning and operating a family farm.
All this is to say, your loved one’s journey with Alzheimer’s or dementia will change and progress, and what might seem uncomfortable for you to think about now could be the approach to care that provides purpose and joy for your loved one.
If you find yourself feeling hesitant because you think that your loved one won’t be comfortable in an environment like this, we encourage you to question if you are feeling that they won’t be successful in the community or if you are feeling guilty.
Guilt is a normal part of the process for family members. Don’t think of this as your worst-case scenario; think of it as the next step in the care journey.
Are you feeling guilty because you think your mom or dad doesn’t belong in that setting, or are you feeling guilty because that setting isn’t at home with you?
These are tough questions and thoughts that we encourage you to sit with and explore, but don’t feel you need to do it alone. Talk with others—family members, support groups, and staff. There is someone out there who has experienced the same thoughts you are having right now.
Whatever the cause or level of your or your loved one’s memory issues, South Mountain Memory Care, with our unique culture, “small house” model, and abundance of certified caregivers, offers you the peace of mind of knowing your loved one will be cared for as if they were our family—which they are!
South Mountain Memory Care is committed to providing individualized, compassionate care to support our residents in achieving a well-balanced lifestyle. We strive to allow our residents to remain independent while emphasizing safety. Our focus is to enrich their life—mind, body, and spirit—by bringing new initiatives into their day-to-day regimen while maintaining the activities they find comfort in. South Mountain Memory Care offers the peace of mind you deserve. When it comes to those you care so deeply about, we understand because we care, too.